The Wedding Traditions I Skipped and Why
The other day I was chatting with my recently-engaged girlfriend about wedding traditions and which ones she was planning on incorporating into her wedding. I have to admit - one of my favorite things about other people's weddings are the traditions. Some of them are universal (e.g. bouquet toss) and still others are more subtle (e.g. sewing fabric from a grandparent's clothing into a wedding gown).
We incorporated some traditions into our wedding that absolutely lit up my life:
1) Military traditions: Hassan gave me his Marine Corps dog tags before the wedding.
2) Something Borrowed: I wore my grandfather's wedding ring that he passed down to his son for his wedding that was then passed down to me for my 'something borrowed'.
3) Something Old: The cuff of my mother's wedding gown served as my 'something old' that was wrapped around my bouquet.
4) New Beginnings: Hassan carried me over the hearth at our house. Read the sweet story (and backstory) here.
And yet there were others that I completely skipped. Some on accident and some on purpose:
1) The garter toss: Look - my thighs are large and I sweat down there so I didn't find it all that sexy or sensuous to think about my new husband removing a hot piece of fabric soaked in my sweaty bridal 'essence'. I found it equally repulsive to think about my new husband's friends grabbing at this disgusting piece of fabric. So we just skipped over that completely. Side note - one of my bridesmaids gifted me a gorgeous garter made of French lace that she bought for me in Paris. Yea- it's in the scrapbook having never been worn.
2) The bouquet toss: The official story - we ran out of time. The unofficial story - I had to pee at exactly the time we were supposed to do the toss, and it took an act of Congress to get all of my undergarments away from my nether-regions to allow me to relieve myself. By the time the fiasco was over, it was time to cut the cake. And I would rather eat cake than do anything else...
3) Jumping the broom: One of the traditions in the African American community is for the bride and groom to jump over a broom after they are pronounced husband and wife by the minister. It's a tradition that arguably dates back to southern slaves who were not permitted to legally wed (although there are other beliefs about the origin of the tradition dating back to west Africa). Look - all of that is fine and I think the tradition is lovely. I just wasn't tryna have a calamity at the altar. All I could envision was me mis-jumping and somehow slipping and falling and having a wardrobe malfunction at the same time. So yea - we just walked our happy asses down the aisle sans-broom.
4) The flower girl and ring bearer: We had a strict 'no children' policy at our wedding. It's not that we don't like kids, it's just that I didn't want anything cuter than me at my wedding. And I really didn't want people cooing at pint-sized time thieves coming down the aisle before me. It's self-preservation, really...
Which traditions did you keep? Which ones did you skip? Share in the comments below!
Feature photo: my bridal bouquet with mother's wedding dress cuff. Also wearing my grandfather and uncle's wedding ring. Photo by JDao Photography