Are You in a Failing Relationship?
Ever since I turned 30, my relationships have gotten very interesting. I've thought a lot about my relationships - be it friendships, intimate relationships and even familial relationships - over the last few years and realize that a lot has changed. Some people who were around just aren't any more. A lot of that has to do with the seasonal aspect of some of those relationships, and still others have ended just because it was time, whether I was prepared for it or not.
One thing about getting older that has surprised me is how friendships, familial relationships and even intimate relationships can shift in an instant. I have dealt with all of these shifts - many of them in the last year. I'm someone whose natural instinct is to feel like I failed when it comes to relationships that end abruptly. But lately I've been working on changing my perspective on this concept. While shifts aren't always easy to manage or make sense of, looking back on things many of those shifts needed to happen for my - or the other person's - sanity! I came across this quote that raises a fundamental question that we should all ask ourselves when wondering if you are in a failing relationship or not. Check it out:
“Most people seem to believe that if a relationship doesn’t last until death, it’s a failure. But the only relationship that’s truly a failure is one that lasts longer than it should. The success of a relationship should be measured by it’s depth, not by its length.”
― Neil Strauss
How much stress could we all save ourselves if we just acknowledged that the failure is not in the fact that a relationship ends but in the fact that it lasted too long. Food for thought...
Quote by Neil Strauss, The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships