One year and a lifetime to go! Today is our one year anniversary and we have learned so many things in 12 short months. I vividly remember standing in the bridal suite with my Dad hyperventilating because I felt the gravity of it all. Like my mother always says, "girls want the wedding, women want the marriage." I was definitely the latter and in that moment in the bridal suite, I instantly felt it all wash over me - the unknown. I knew we loved eachother, made a great team, supported one another and complimented one another. But what I didn't know was what the future held. And how could I, really? I'd never been a wife before! And so in that moment with my Dad, I hyperventilated. My Dad laughed. Having been married over 40 years to my mom, he simply said, "you will both be fine, you'll figure it all out."
As someone who is type-A to a fault, I don't like not being in control. Well honey, I'm here to tell you that marriage, at least for me, has meant letting some of that control freak-ishness go. What I learned in 12 months of marriage is that you cannot....CAN-NOT...predict or plan for all of the things that come your way. We have been met with challenges this year that I could not have planned for and could not control. So we just decided to fall back on our faith and what we knew to be true of our partnership and met the challenges head on.
We also learned that merging two lives is not easy. Having gotten married "later in life" (whatever that means other than 'not in our twenties'), we have had to resist the urge to allow our routines and normal ways of doing things take over. Instead, we have had to learn how to be open to considering a different viewpoint or method. This has been the toughest lesson for us both because admittedly, we are set in our ways. For instance, I am very particular about doing things in advance whereas Hassan tends towards the procrastination end of the spectrum. This has caused some uncomfortable moments, but at the end of the day, if we both give eachother some leeway and exercise understanding, we can avoid becoming annoyed.
There are many, many more lessons that we've learned in this short time being married, but overall, it was one of the best decisions that we've both made. There are days when it's not pretty (mama says "not every day is a good day"), but it's the most eye-opening and rewarding thing I've done. You see, In taking this leap and vowing "for forever" to someone, you put a huge mirror in front of yourself and are forced to confront....(wait for it).....YOURSELF- all the mess, all the baggage, all the quirks - and you ask someone to love you despite it all. And blessed is the one that finds the person willing to do it....
Happy anniversary, baby! Thank you for loving ALL of me!