An Interesting Thing I Learned About My Mother
My husband and I are still living with my folks while we wait for our new house to be completed. Next week will mark one year since we've lived with my parents. I often get asked how I like living with parents (in my old room with my new husband). That's a topic for an entire post that I have yet to complete, but as you can imagine there are joys and challenges that come along with it.
Let me not mince words - there are things that irritate me about living with my folks, but I will focus on one thing in particular. Sometimes my mail comes to my parents' house, and when it does, my mom will come to wherever I am in the house and toss the mail right in front of me or ON TOP OF ME if I am laying down. It has annoyed me for years, but last week I finally snapped (not smart) and said, "why do you always throw my mail down like that?" She retorted: "to piss you off" before doing a diva turn on her heel and walking back out of the door. Welp...
A few days later - and after being shaken to my core by Smokey Robinson's answer to one particular question about Aretha Franklin and her work with the Movement - I asked my mom a question about how such a movement got such consistent buy-in from black folks all around the country (a topic for another post). She told me about how her mother used to come in the house on some afternoons and throw down copies of Jet, Ebony, and The Crisis Magazine on the kitchen table. It was expected that each person in the house would read the materials and be prepared to discuss the topics contained therein. She then went on to say, "so I think that's why I throw down mail and other things that you may be interested in. I get it from my mother."
In that moment I understood my mother in a deeper way. You see, I never met my maternal grandmother but I hear she was a lovely woman and was adored by her family. In that moment I felt like I instantly knew my grandmother and immediately knew why - because my mother is her mother. What a beautiful realization to come to!
So now when my mom comes in the room and throws mail or other things in front of me, instead of getting irritated, I will smile and recognize the presence of my grandmother working through my mom. Now that's just lovely!